Tired....

I have a cold. Well I think I do, it might be that my allergies have finally won the battle against Claritin. Either way, I just want to sleep.

So I've come back to theatre this week. Acting and directing for Beyond Convention, which I'm loving so far. Directing is so much fun, at least on this small scale. I love that all the silly ridiculous ideas that come into my head can actually be done! And I just have to say, try this! It's a rush. Love being able to sit back and get to see my work. Acting is still my first love though and I hope that I can memorize lines again. Isn't that funny, how the most mundane part of it is usually my biggest worry. Do I still have the capacity to remember what to say and when? God I hope so. On top of that we're also beginning rehearsals for Flying Spaghetti Monster: The Holy Mug of Grog. Yes, that's right boys and girls, Bonnie rides again! Sadly, my Shamus will not be the same person. I'm sad, but I'll make do. I love Bonnie though, she hasn't been heard from since the Much Ado cast party and I miss her. :)

Update on the fella I went out with last month. We've been emailing off and on, he's been really busy so we haven't hung out again, but I think he'll come see my shows. I keep going back and forth on this. I like him, and he won major bonus points the other day for recognizing what my email address is from. I just have a hard time, letting things just be what they are and I wish I had more insight into what he thought about me. Yes, hello, Leo actor, what about me? Does he like me as a friend, does he see a potential for it being something else, am I just a freak? Yes, I need to take a Valium I know, because then I start freaking out a little over absolutely nothing. Probably the answer is that I'm just a freak. Still the attention is delightful, and I admit that when I do get a text or an email out of the blue, I get a little giddy. There was a picture of us together from the wedding and it was really cute and I started to get warm fuzzies and I just don't really know what that's about, it's entirely too soon for that. Ok, I need to stop, starting to get panicky.


Yes, this is a catch up blog and I'm bored at work with no one to talk to, so suck it. I'm just going to keep writing random thoughts until I'm done. :) I'm sick of the weather. Fuck, it's so hot! It's almost Halloween and it's not even remotely fall like. I just want to bundle up on the couch and drink hot chocolate and apple cider and make pumpkin bread. I want it to be dark and cold and spooky and fit with my lonely moods.

This morning I flipped off an old man out on the corner with his Vote Yes on 8 sign. Supposedly a Yes vote = religious freedom. Wow, I was never aware that one of my main constitional rights was somehow in jeopardy because two of my dear friends who love each other would like to make it official and have the same rights that I do should I decide to shackle myself to another human being. Again. These people are seriously pissing me off. I doubt that he even saw me but it made me feel better in some really juvenile way. 7:30 in the morning and I have to deal with your political bullshit. I needed a hashbrown.

It's National AP Appreciation Week! I bet you didn't know that. We've been doing lots of fun activities this week, like breakfast at Denny's and yesterday we got a 15 min massage which was very nice and I still have the bruises as a souvenir. Tomorrow, we'll be watching Office Space, and I'm the only one that sees the irony in that. Seriously. Today we're going to grow some plants and on Friday department field trip to Color Me Mine! Is it fun? Sure, unfortunately I have a keen eye for the absurd and there's something so ridiculous about all this. But they're feeding me so I guess I won't complain.

Speaking of work, yes I got a promotion and a raise, yay me. Normally I would be celebrating, but the truth is that I feel guilty about it. I feel bad that I'm ok (knock wood) while everyone around me is either already unemployed or may be soon. I even feel a little bad about being the only one in my department that is happy with this restructure that we did that gave me the promotion. Just generally feel guilty.

Ooo Wii Fit! Ok, so I've had it for a week and a half now and I've been pretty good about working out. And it really is a work out, I'm totally sweating after 20 minutes. I didn't do it last night as I was feeling puny, and of course I haven't really lost any inches yet, but I do feel the difference, just stronger, well until I got the cold at least. I love my Wii!

Ok, I guess that's it, I've wasted enough time. Sigh.